One of the most unsettling feelings is… feeling unsettled! Whether it’s a new job we’re facing, a change of home or even a change in yourself and your circumstances – it’s an unsettling and mightily uncomfortable experience.
It’s a natural thing to feel because we’re walking into unknown territory. We may be feeling for a number of reasons; fear we don’t know how to deal with the change, doubt in ourselves and our abilities, fear we will not be enough or that we ultimately can’t handle what comes our way.
We tend to feel lost, frustrated, anxious and stressed when we go through a big change and whilst there may be may reasons we feel this way, there’s one underlying cause for it. Resistance.
We quite often resist what we don’t know, because it makes us uncomfortable. We stick to what we do know because it’s easy and familiar and it’s this little gem that keeps us stuck in that unsettling feeling.
If you’re reading this, it’s quite likely because you’re feeling discomfort in something about your situation and you’re fed up of feeling that way. I want you to give yourself a pat on the back for recognizing this and doing something about it. Half of the challenge is admitting something is up and having the courage to change that. See – change isn’t that bad is it!
5 Steps to Shift Feeling Unsettled
In order to overcome the icky feeling of uncertainty and the stress that comes along with feeling unsettled, there are certain things you can do to feel great again.
- Identify where this resistance is coming from. Get nice and honest with yourself, grab a pen and piece of paper and get writing. What emotions are coming up and where is this fear stemming from?
- Imagine yourself talking to a 6 year old you, and she’s feeling the same thing as you are now. What is she telling you? What would you tell her back?
- Now I want you to write everything that is on your mind. Everything from what you think could go wrong, to everything that is worrying you and plaguing your mind. Literally everything, write it down. Then stop. Take a deep breath. Scribble that out, rip it up, burn it! Whatever feels the most cathartic for you. Now write down everything about how you want it to go. Everything that is great about the situation. All the things you’re capable of (if you need a little help with this, skip to the next point). Everything you’re already grateful for. Keep this note with you, and whenever you feel yourself slipping into the negative and overwhelming feelings, whip it out and repeat it aloud.
- Write down all your past achievements. Think back to when you were last in a similar situation and write all the great things that happened because of it, or everything you learnt from it. If you’ve never been in a similar situation, think back to other times where you’ve done something you’re proud of and have enjoyed and remind yourself of your greatness.
- Finally, and this feels scary before you do it but the relief after is magnificent. Write down the worst case scenario. What is the worst that can happen? And now visualize yourself overcoming that situation with ease and flow. Take a deep breath, take a few if you need and smile to yourself and your power.
You are so much more powerful than you give yourself credit for, and your courage and confidence is commendable, that little side of you may have just been lost along the way. She may have been hidden under fear and negative self-talk but she’s there and she’s ready to shine again. Doing those 5 steps will uncover those limitations we place on ourselves and will allow that beautiful glow to shine through.